Substituting
by Care-Blaire
Summary: Or the four times Rachel viewed Kurt and Blaine as her dads, and the one time she views Santana as her mom. Kurt/Blaine


**The four times Rachel viewed Kurt and Blaine as her dads, and the one time she viewed Santana as her mom.**

**Written from Rachel's point of view, and I'd like to point out she never got the part for Fanny Brice like she did in Season 5, and she didn't audition for it and it didn't happen.**

* * *

Rachel missed her dads. Of course she did. She loved them, and living in New York was her dream, but sometimes she did wish they were gathered round the piano singing "You're the top" together. And eating breakfast together, and when she was little climbing into their bed when she had a nightmare, talking about school with them and them always turning up after a performance with a bouquet of flowers and a hug.

It was only natural she started to look for substitutes for them.

* * *

**1.**

She walked into the kitchen one morning to get some breakfast. Kurt and Blaine were already awake. Blaine had moved into the loft a couple of weeks before, and had fitted in so easily it was like he had always been there. Kurt seemed a lot happier with him there too.

Currently, Blaine was sitting on the counter and cupping Kurt's cheek as he kissed him softly, both oblivious to the rest of the world. Kurt was wearing an apron and had been in the middle of cooking it appeared before Blaine turned up and distracted him.

Rachel couldn't help viewing them as her dads sometimes. They might as well be a married couple already the way they acted around eachother, but Rachel knew there was still at least a year of wedding plans before they actually tied the knot.

"Break it up boys, you're putting me off my breakfast," Santana snapped at them good naturedly as she swept into the kitchen in a flimsy nightdress.

"Will you put some clothes on?" Kurt retorted, "You're putting me off _my_ breakfast."

"I'm living with two gay males and a straight female, if there were ever a time to walk around half naked it would be now," she told him. "Now what's for breakfast?"

Kurt glared at her and made his way back to the stove.

"Kurt's making pancakes," Blaine answered for him happily. He got off of the counter and turned to smile at Rachel warmly. "Help me set the table, Rach?"

Rachel nodded. "Sure."

They walked around their small table together, placing knives and forks. "How'd you sleep?" Blaine asked her as they worked.

"Fine," she said, "I had a bit of a weird dream though."

"Want to talk about it?" he offered sympathetically.

"No its fine," she said. They finished and Blaine patted her shoulder in a fatherly way as he walked back to the kitchen. "I'm always here if you want to talk."

When breakfast was ready and the four of them sat around the table (Kurt and Santana had a yelling match until Santana put on a bath robe) with Kurt doling out pancakes.

"Want an extra pancake, sweetie?" Kurt asked her, "You've been doing so well in class and I think you deserve it."

"Yes please," she said happily, taking in the paternal warmth in his voice and letting it soothe the ache for her dads.

"Hey, I want an extra one if Berry's getting one," Santana argued.

Kurt rolled his eyes and slipped her an extra one before settling next to Blaine, who pecked his cheek happily before tucking in.

Yup, sometimes it definitely felt like they were a little family.

And Santana was that angry aunt who slept on the sofa and refused to leave.

* * *

**2.**

_She was standing in front of a huge crowd, all cheering a whooping for her. She was in the middle of her debut as Fanny Brice, right at the start of the reprise of "Don't rain on my parade" at the end of the performance of Funny Girl._

_"Don't tell me not to live just sit and putter_

_Life's candy and the suns a ball of butter_

_Don't bring around a cloud to rain on my parade."_

_It was everything she'd ever dreamed of rolled into one moment, because she was finally a star._

_"Don't tell me not fly I've simply got to_

_Life's candy and the suns a ball of-"_

_She had gotten the words wrong._

_Suddenly the entire audience was laughing at her and throwing eggs, Vocal Adrenaline right in the middle of the crowd, Jesse St. James leading them._

_The mothers of all the eggs charged onto the stage and pecked at her furiously in revenge._

_Journalists published newspapers immediately and they were already selling thousands a go; "Rachel chokes Fanny Brice" and the crowd was buying them and sending them to relatives all over the world_

_Brody Weston and Cassandra July and Carmen Tipideaux were there, pointing and shrieking with laughter._

_Shelby Corcoran shook her head, turned away and left, clearly ashamed._

_And then Barbra Streisand walked on stage._

_"You're an embarrassment!" she screamed, "an embarrassment!"_

_~ . ~ . ~ . ~_

Rachel woke up in a cold sweat. It was 2am.

"Just a dream," she told herself, "Just a dream."

She leant back against her pillows and tried to go to sleep again but found herself unable to it. What if she had the dream again? The loft was dark and scary and lonely.

She did the only thing she could think to do.

Rachel slipped out of bed, through the curtain to Kurt and Blaine's bed. She tapped Kurt's shoulder, and he looked up groggily.

"What is it Rachel?"

"I had a nightmare. Can I sleep with you and Blaine tonight?"

Kurt sighed and shuffled to make room between him and Blaine. Rachel swiftly got under the covers between them, feeling a lot safer.

"Tomorrow night she's sleeping in her own bed," Blaine murmured, but let Rachel cuddle up to him.

* * *

**3.**

Rachel walked into the loft, her head hanging dejectedly, dropped her bag on the floor and flopped onto the couch. She had had a terrible day at NYADA and felt like curling up and crying.

"Hey Rachel," Kurt called to her in greeting from the kitchen, "How was school?"

She didn't reply.

"Rachel?" he peered at her from the kitchen, "What's wrong?"

She still didn't reply.

Kurt gestured to Blaine and they both came to sit next to her on either side. Kurt curled his arm around her shoulder and she leant against him. "Did something bad happen?"

"You can tell us anything, Rachel," Blaine added, rubbing her arm comfortingly.

"It's just…" she started, "The girls at school were really mean to me again."

Kurt tutted. "You know they're just jealous of your talent."

"It's not just that," she told them, "NYADA is doing Funny Girl for the musical this year, and I thought about auditioning and they told me that I was too short, and my nose was too big and my voice too…" She whispered, "Pitchy."

Blaine froze and Kurt inhaled deeply. "Who said this?"

"My classmates," Rachel told him miserably.

"Well if the producers didn't tell you, then you've got as good a chance as anyone," Blaine said firmly. "Probably more than them, because you're such a better person."

"It's also because…" she hesitated, "I was just thinking how F-Finn told me that I was going to be a star, and how he always believed in me…"

Kurt's arm tightened around her. Finn had died a few months before, and Rachel was still not totally over it. She missed him every day.

"Finn would tell you to stay strong and audition despite their comments," Kurt said firmly, "He still believes in you."

Blaine nodded in agreement. "We all know you have the talent to do this Rachel."

"You guys really think so?"

"Yes," they said at the same time.

It meant a lot that they believed in her, and were there to support her like her two dads would. Even with them in Lima, she still had Kurt and Blaine to keep her going.

* * *

**4.**

She got Fanny Brice.

She didn't choke onstage, Shelby even came to watch and told her how amazing she was, Cassandra July looked grudgingly proud and Brody Weston gave her the thumbs up from a distance. She thought she even glimpsed Jesse St. James there to watch her, but he was gone before she could get a better look.

Her dads couldn't make it, her real dads, but sent all their love and her first performance trophy for good luck. She had won it when she was two years old.

Kurt, Blaine and Santana were there of course.

Santana gave her a tight one armed hug, and Rachel didn't comment on the used tissue held tightly in her fist from wiping away tears.

And Kurt and Blaine, her substitute dads, arms linked and with a huge bouquet of flowers.

"You were amazing," Kurt said, fiercely kissing the top of her head.

"You're are very own star," Blaine said, handing her the flowers and hugging her.

Rachel beamed at them. "Thanks for coming you guys. It means a lot."

"Finn would have thought you were great too," Kurt promised her, and she nodded, willing away the tears in her eyes.

* * *

**1.**

That night she lay in bed feeling more alone than ever.

She had performed amazingly, and her biological mom was there to see her, and now she wished she had a mom where to hold her.

Kurt and Blaine were great substitute dads, but she really wanted a mother figure to comfort her now.

And Finn, whom she had loved so many years, not there to see her debut as Fanny Brice, even if it was just a NYADA production of it, and not Broadway.

Before she could stop it she was crying, letting out quiet whimpers and sniffling slightly, warm tears dripping down her face and her sobs gliding through the otherwise silent apartment.

Then the curtain partition opened and she felt a warm body sliding into bed beside her and wrapping arms around her.

It was a woman, clearly, from certain parts of her body.

"Santana," she whispered, "What are you doing here?"

"You were crying, dope," came the reply. "Want to tell 'Tana what's wrong?

Rachel shuffled closer to her. "I was thinking about how Finn wasn't there to watch me perform in New York for the first time as Fanny."

Santana rubbed her hands up and down Rachel's back. "It's okay. We all miss him Rachel."

"Not like I do," Rachel murmured.

They were quiet for a couple of minutes, Santana holding her.

"Santana?"

"Yup?"

"Will you sing me to sleep?"

Santana was silent in surprise, and then sighed. "Tell anybody about this and I'll cut you. What do you want me to sing?"

"Your rendition of Songbird is really beautiful…"

Santana froze, her body tensing, before shrugging. "Sure… If you want…"

_"For you, there'll be no more cryin'  
For you, the sun will be shinin'  
And I feel that when I'm with you,  
It's alright, I know it's right."_

Rachel was already feeling sleepy and comforted.

_"To you, I'll give the world  
To you, I'll never be cold  
'Cause I feel that when I'm with you,  
It's alright, I know it's right."_

She was asleep, but Santana kept singing quietly in the silent apartment until the chorus was finished.

_"And the songbirds are singing  
Like they know the score  
And I love you, I love you, I love you,  
Like never before."_

* * *

**Yay. Finished. **

**Comment if you got all of the references I made :P**


End file.
